God Is Not Fair. Just Ask Julie.
Have you ever seen Jesus? I believe Julie did; here's her true story...
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Julie lies in the hospital bed, a pale shadow of her former health. Her mother is at her side, able to offer but a little comfort as she gasps for breath. The cancer has been unrelenting, stubbornly refusing to respond to aggressive chemotherapy and radiation. One lung is gone and the other deteriorating. The young lady has been telling others that God has promised healing before Christmas. Fall is now in the air, and healing seems so far away. The doctors have ceased treatments and are now just trying to keep her comfortable. She has lost significant weight, cannot breathe without help, and is experiencing bone-deep pain.
In the midst of one of her frequent gasping sequences, she suddenly stops. The cessation and calm is quite unusual, and her mom wonders what is happening. Julie looks toward the foot of the bed, and then to her mother, and asks, “Do you see him?” Mom looks around the room, sees nothing, and says nothing. “Do you see him, mom, right there at the foot of my bed?” Her mother realizes that, perhaps, something significant is taking place. She smiles, Julie seems no longer disturbed or fearful, and turns over for some much-needed sleep. She sleeps long and restfully for many hours. When she awakens late in the evening, her mom is still at her side. Julie opens her eyes, looks first at that mysterious space below her bed, and then to her mother. “He’s still here.”
“Describe him to me”, she asks.
“He’s right there. He’s been with me the whole time. I cannot see his features; his appearance is somewhat misty. But he has something like points coming from his head.”
“Points?” mom queries to herself, but remains quiet.
“And, he said something to me. He asked me a question. “Julie, do you trust me?”
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I would like to say there is a fairy-tale ending to this story. This mysterious visitor remains with Julie for quite some time. His presence is very comforting and demeanor kind. He is seen only by Julie. And, the only words he speaks are not a promise of healing. Just a pointed query, “Julie, do you trust me?”
She died before Christmas. I traveled across the states to attend her funeral, and to be honest, there was little comfort in the ceremony itself. I kept thinking, with a grim face, how very unfair is this God. But I did not know this episode of the story until several years later.
“Julie, do you trust me?” God is not fair. Really, scriptures and life have never even pretended to make such assertion. Julie was a simple little girl, not a theological whiz. Her faith in God was simple and unending. She hurt, cried, and questioned. And to the very end, with her childlike and yet quite mature way, she trusted.
God is not fair. But, God is good.
09.30.05 (12:38 pm) [
edit]
posted by:
Fairmoon (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (10:29 am)
what a said story. I'm so sorry for your loss and her families loss. thank you for sharing.
FM
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (11:02 am)
Thank you for your compassion. The story has a clear element of sadness, true, but also hope. Julie's hope lay not in her trust of God for healing- just in her trust of God. I believe that is the message. When life and God seem unfair, trust Him.
posted by:
sweetsue (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (11:02 am)
Yes the loss of a loved one is the hardest to bare. That is so touching Pastor Dave...and how trusting we are and must be in our faith..thank you for sharing this story.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (11:28 am)
Reply to: sweetsue
I hope the story is not so sad that the message of hope is not overlooked. So much about God is paradox, including Julie's experience. She was not healed. But, she has been healed.
posted by:
Makaveli (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (12:06 pm)
omg..that story is so touching..i really liked it..u have a real cool and interesting blog here..:)
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (3:38 pm)
Reply to: Makaveli
Thanks. This has been a life changing experience for me, and I've wanted to share it for some time. Finally I'm able to write about it.
Please come back for future posts.
posted by:
passionsoul (
reply)
post date:
09.30.05 (4:59 pm)
This is an inspiring story and I thank you for sharing it with us.Your closing,so true while God may not seen fair he is good!
posted by:
graceshaker (
reply)
post date:
10.01.05 (8:07 am)
as i read your story i was reminded of several in my own life that are very similar - at least in the seeming lack of fairness dept.
i dont know why but my mind is always drawn to pauls statement in 1 corinthians 15:19...if we have hoped in Christ in this life only, we are of all men most to be pitied.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
10.01.05 (11:22 am)
Reply to: graceshaker
Your quote from Corinthians is important. Eternal Life is the great equalizer with the "fairness" issue, and that will be one of my future essays as I explore this matter.
Thanks for reading.
posted by:
Kupov (
reply)
post date:
10.01.05 (11:45 am)
Would you believe her is she said she saw a different God? Think about that.
posted by:
LeananSidhe (
reply)
post date:
10.02.05 (4:39 pm)
True it is sad but also comforting. To know Julie saw and felt something that so comforted her, whatever it may have been, is wonderful.
Thanks for sharing Julie's story Dave.
posted by:
LynnKramer (
reply)
post date:
10.05.05 (8:15 am)
To find out God’s purpose, on any matter, you must go to the source—God’s Instruction Manual, sent along by the Creator with His creation (man).
God’s Word reveals the answers to life’s greatest questions.
Surely, the reason for human suffering is one of the greatest answers of all.
Mankind’s suffering is not an accident. It is actually one of the most marvelous tools within God’s Plan of making sons who have developed His character within them.
The purpose for every human being’s life is to develop the perfect, holy, righteous character of Almighty God.
Suffering is directly tied to building character. Since God is longsuffering, it is also obvious then, that no person is complete in the development of God’s nature and character until he has learned the value of human suffering!
Wise King Solomon was inspired by God to record one of the great principles in the Bible: “In the day of prosperity be joyful, but in the day of adversity consider: God also has set the one over against the other, to the end that man should find nothing after him” (Ecc. 7:14).
Did you understand this verse? God did this! God designed life so that we would face “adversity” and be forced to “consider” the circumstances we are experiencing. Certainly, adversity is no fun. It is sometimes very difficult, hard, painful, even traumatic, to endure. Yet, God said He engineered the human existence to include adversity! This seems strange to the human mind that wants a free pass to sail through life, experiencing only the good life—good times!
Verses 2 and 3 reveal more of God’s purpose in permitting suffering. Solomon also recorded this: “It is better to go to the house of mourning, than to go to the house of feasting: for that is the end of all men; and the living will lay it to his heart. Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made better.”
Does this passage shock you? Does it make sense that “sorrow is better than laughter” or that “the house of mourning is better than the house of feasting”? Yet these statements are God’s plain words about how He views suffering—and that He actually designed this physical life to require it.
Understand. If one is mourning, it is usually because something terrible has happened—serious illness, painful divorce, death of a child or loved one, loss of property through a disaster or bankruptcy, or something similar. Therefore, this passage seems absolutely backwards to the human mind. This is why Solomon states that “feasting is…the end of all men.” The goal of the average person is to make life one long, neverending party—or “feast.”
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
10.05.05 (3:43 pm)
Reply to: Kupov
Just because a person claims to see a vision is not trustworthy in itself. First I must consider the stability of the person. Julie displayed through her life a healthy spirituality. She was not given to extravagant claims. Just a simple and abiding faith. Then I must consider the state of the person at the time of the vision. At this particular time, she was not on strong drugs or narcotics. She did not like how they made her feel, and thus insisted on their termination. And I must consider the nature of the vision itself. If it is counter to the message of scripture or the person of Christ as revealed in the scripture, then I must consider it suspect. For her vision of Jesus to ask "Do you trust me?" is consistent. Jesus queried similar with Peter at Cesaerea Philippi and also post-resurrection beside the Sea of Galilee. His questions are always quite revealing and challenging. So I trust her vision to be genuine.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
10.05.05 (3:54 pm)
Reply to: LynnKramer
I do appreciate your thoughtful consideration. Indeed, the Bible teaches that suffering is necessary for maturity into the likeness of Christ.
But much of human suffering does not tie up neatly into this explanation. When I visit at Egleston Children's Hospital here in Atlanta, I see little boys and girls who are experiencing a devestating life. Brain tumors, severe deformities, incurable diseases. Most of these kids die. They do not just learn lessons for spiritual maturity. They die. And then I see people who live in ways that are harmful and counterproductive to society, and they often live long and healthful lives. No, it is not fair. The Bible tells us "it rains on the just and the unjust". Romans admonishes, "Why should the clay argue with the potter?" Many, many people ask earnestly why God allows such to occur. I have communicated with several right on this blog who have turned their backs on the Christian faith because of the seeming ineptitude of God in the midst of life's unfairness.
My story of Julie is an attempt to offer a dialogue.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
10.05.05 (4:45 pm)
Reply to: LeananSidhe
I interpret that Jesus was telling Julie that he would take care of her. Maybe life was not very pleasant at the time, but life would be much more than her experience on this earth.
