Must I Do Laundry?
It was just a comfortable evening at home. My teenage daughter was sitting in the middle of the living room floor, separating clothes from the laundry. Several piles of my clothing were included with the assortment. As I remember, I was reading the newspaper or watching television, just relaxing and minding my own business.
Succinctly, Katie spoke up, her diatribe along the lines of the following: “Daddy, you know the majority of these clothes are yours. Why don’t you help with the laundry? You know mommy works hard, and she is not your slave. As it seems to me, you ought to wash, separate, and fold these clothes as much as she.”
I looked at her, speechless. She has been a rather quiet little girl. We’ve had an unspoken understanding about roles in this family. I cut the grass, take care of the cars, and try to do household repairs. Seldom have I cleaned house and never have I done laundry. And now this kid wanted to know why. I stammered and wanted to tell her to mind her own business. After all, I have a pretty good thing going around here, and she wants to mess with it. I looked at this young lady who is growing up fast. I smiled, and meekly replied, “I guess you are right.”
My wife found out about the conversation. She said she will have to give Katie a pat on the back. And now they are watching me to see when I will actually do something about this newest challenge of life.
I asked the Lord about it. Would Jesus wash clothes? And, this time he looked a lot like my daughter as he replied, “Wash clothes? I washed feet. So, Dave, find the laundry detergent and get to work.”
11.01.05 (7:26 am) [
edit]
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (4:38 am)
It is striking to me that I have lived for all these years and never thought seriously about how unfair it is for me to expect my wife to do all the laundry. That's a pretty glaring imperfection. You've got me beat on this aspect of life.
posted by:
ScubaDiva (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (5:34 am)
I went to college not having a clue about how to do laundry. Talk about crash course.
I think you should set an example and show your daughter that it's helpful to be self-sufficient in all areas - be it laundry (you don't want to end up with pink boxers do you?), home improvements, or car stuff.
Perhaps Katie can show YOU how to do laundry. That would be entertaining.
posted by:
surrogate (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (11:12 am)
I'm telling you Dave, those daughters'll wreck your peaceful existance every time... they start out so cute and thinkin' you're perfect and all, and then BAM, all of a sudden, you're just another person they have to deal with thoughout the day....
You'll notice that, at least as far as I know, Jesus was smart enough to not have kids. Bet he'd have love the "cute years." But he sure wouldn't have had time to deal with a self aware young woman.
Try bribing her, or you'll end up doing what I did... (finding out that if you wash in cold water, you can get away without as much separating...)
posted by:
preceptlady (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (12:59 pm)
ummm.....I suspect Jesus did laundry. Besides healing the sick, raising the dead and making the blind see....I bet He did His own laundry.
Girls are like that. Which tells me she will make an excellent wife. :)
Good post.
posted by:
mmmkay (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (1:09 pm)
awwww beautiful story! I've had my share of wakeup calls too..
It takes alot of strength sometimes though to actually DO what we should. I commend you for not ignoring it.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (3:31 pm)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
Alright, I guess the best way to teach self-sufficiency is to model such. I will do the laundry, but how do you keep the underwear from being pink? Maybe if I hint that such may happen, Katie will just volunteer to continue as things currently are?
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (3:34 pm)
Reply to: surrogate
Bribery...an interesting possibility. She does respond well to money. But neither of my girls keep secrets from their mother. And, if she learned of the deal, I would be in serious trouble. It's not that I am afraid of her, it's just that...I'm afraid of herl
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (3:36 pm)
Reply to: preceptlady
Actually I admire that she is willing to speak up and challenge me. She did it with respect and honesty, and such skill will serve her well. How I respond to criticism is an important example to her.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (3:38 pm)
Reply to: mmmkay
Being reminded that I've got a need for personal growth is always a wake up call. Sometimes I make excuses, and sometimes I'm teachable. Thanks for the comment.
posted by:
surrogate (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (5:23 pm)
Reply to: PastorDave
fear keeps us nimble... especially 3 specific fears: fear of our spouces, fear of our children, and most importanly... Fear of being really, really wrong.
I like the dollar store softener sheets.
posted by:
graceshaker (
reply)
post date:
11.01.05 (5:53 pm)
what would Jesus wash eh?
as a stay at home papa i can say that separating and washing is really the easy part - as long as you can keep them involved in folding and hanging youre still on top of the situation. Ü
posted by:
ScubaDiva (
reply)
post date:
11.02.05 (1:57 am)
Reply to: PastorDave
Well, being that I have 'girly' undies, I wash them by hand.
What if Katie and your wife go on a girl's trip - say to look at colleges for a week or two? Wouldn't it be nice to know that you know how to do it just in case?
Being manipulative (hinting the impending pink underwear) would not be a very positive example to demonstrate to a young girl. And she probably wouldn't be impacted as much as you would by pink underwear. Just imagine going all day praying you don't get hit by a truck so that the ER folks see your pink underwear.
posted by:
surrogate (
reply)
post date:
11.04.05 (12:52 am)
Reply to: graceshaker
A stay at home dad? Now I know why your blog always looks so good... You sneak on line and tweek all the time don't you? Come on, admit it....lol
posted by:
graceshaker (
reply)
post date:
11.04.05 (9:17 am)
Reply to: surrogate
er...who me? Ü
posted by:
sweetsue (
reply)
post date:
11.05.05 (4:28 pm)
Good for your daughter! Not only is it helping out,but also a good thing for you to learn..you just never know when you will have to do it.And yes Jesus did wash feet..and I think that is worse..cause I don't find feet a good thing except for holding me up and getting around..cool post Pastor Dave!
posted by:
almsthvn (
reply)
post date:
11.06.05 (6:46 pm)
Reply to: PastorDave
LOL at being afraid of your wife!
My dad, a minister, always joked (?) that he never had to put the fear of G*d in us, because we already had the fear of Mom!
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.07.05 (5:33 am)
Reply to: sweetsue
My daughter is becoming more confident, independent, and expressive as she moves into adulthood. Its a new phase in our relationship, and I admit the challenge is also fun.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
11.07.05 (5:34 am)
Reply to: almsthvn
I'm not afraid of her. I just do what she says, day in and day out, because of........love (masquerading as fear).
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
12.08.05 (6:42 pm)
Reply to: MomofMany
Still working on this thing. My clothes are piling up aside my bed, as my wife and daughters are refusing to do my laundry. Suddenly, I can no longer get by with my insensitive chauvenism.
By the way, my oldest daughter is at College. She comes home about twice a month with a big bag of dirty clothes. I guess I should help her.
