Yeah, I've Got A Big, Black, Hole In My Face. You Don't Like It?
Obsessive? I don’t think so.
Yesterday I had a small cosmetic surgical procedure. It was nothing much, although I did count 142 tiles in the office ceiling. The most painful part of such a trip is always the sting of the shot. It was followed by snipping with some little razor-like scissors, and the nice burning sensation of cauterization. So I walked around the rest of the day with a small-but-noticeable black burned spot on my face. There were various meetings and encounters throughout the day, and so I probably interacted with a couple of hundred people. Interestingly, absolutely no adult made a single comment about my face. Surely they noticed? I notice such things! If a woman’s mascara runs, I notice. If a man has food on his face or between his teeth, I notice.
Obsessive-Compulsive?
But, it is true that I just do not say anything. Such is the propriety and good manners of being civil. But I think about it. And I wonder what others think about this big, black hole in my face? My wife says I’m being silly, that it is just a tiny little spot. Yeah? I can only imagine all the conversations in the hallways and behind my back about the now disgusting nature of my appearance.
Paranoid?
I drove the bus last night, to take a group of kids home from church. As they were filing onto the vehicle, all were looking at my face.
“What happened?”
“Do you have cancer?”
“Man, that looks gross.”
Now, that’s the way it ought to be. I felt better.
05.29.08 (10:05 am) [
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posted by:
squirrelzone (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (7:22 am)
I would have commented too. Not to be mean or anything mind you, to offer a little compassion for what you must be going through internally.
I just hope it doesn't throw off the gravitational pull of our planetary system. If it does then we know how to blame.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (7:27 am)
Reply to: squirrelzone
"...throw off the gravitational pull..." So, you think, maybe, just maybe, I'm making a tad too-big-of-a-deal about this thing?
posted by:
squirrelzone (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (7:38 am)
Reply to: PastorDave
Not at all, I think I would probably go through the same roller coaster of emotions as you.
****Please keep all arms and legs in the vehicle while it is in motion......
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (8:11 am)
Reply to: userfriendly
And, that is why I like kids. Such honesty is not meant to be mean, just a statement of what is on the mind at the moment. We have to train kids to be careful with how they express their view, and even to deal with shades of truth. Kind of sad. But I appreciate straightforward honesty. Until, I detect its use as deliberate opportunity to inflict injury. That's never o.k.
posted by:
intricategirl (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (8:56 am)
I probably wouldn't have said anything. It would be fairly obvious that you had been burned, or had some sort of surgical procedure. And I'm sure you're well aware of the fact, so I don't feel the need to point it out.
Now, food in your teeth or mascara, I will point out. They probably aren't aware, and might like to know before they have conversations with people. Any small embarrassment I cause will save them from much greater embarrassment later, and I don't want them wondering why I didn't say anything to them.
posted by:
auntconi (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (9:08 am)
Kids, gotta love em!
The thing about people not saying anything is that one could walk around all day with their shirt tag sticking up in the back ~ and stuff like that.
Something could be said!
By the way, how is that big, black, hole, umm, er I mean that spot on your face? Does it still hurt? You look 'different' ~ but still cute as a button ~ wait, are buttons cute? :)
posted by:
barnabus1 (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (10:03 am)
I love the forthright honesty of children!! It's too bad that it has to be taken from them!!
I would have probably asked, "What happened?" if I knew you...if I didn't know you...wellll I wouldn't want to get my head zonked in!! I do tell people...even those unknowns...if they have something that could embarass them, that should be quickly removed!
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (10:22 am)
Reply to: barnabus1
It is nice that you tell people in order to save them embarassment. I saw a man the other day with a long stream of toilet tissue trailing from his foot. It was about five feet long, and quite noticeable as he meandered along the way. I followed him as long as possible, mainly because I was curious to know how long he would go that way before someone would tell him. Unfortunately, he closed a door and broke the tissue from his foot. He never knew. And, that could have been me.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (10:25 am)
Reply to: auntconi
Oh, the big, black, gaping hole in my face is fine. A few birds have taken up residence, and it produces a distinct echo from the voices of those nearby, but otherwise I think it is unassuming.
posted by:
PastorDave (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (10:30 am)
Reply to: intricategirl
I guess I'd just like to hear an acknowledgment of the obvious. Could it be that the people with whom I interact are so casual and impersonal with our relationship that they do not even notice what seems to me a major change? Maybe I could lose an ear or an eye, or gain a hundred pounds, or start wearing a head scarf and yet the change never to be noticed? Perhaps "friends and associates" will go through a couple of months, and then two will look at one another and say, "You know, I haven't seen Dave around for the last year." They will look in my office and see my skeleton sitting at the desk.
Now, that would be a sad story?
posted by:
FinalyFree (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (10:44 am)
One of the few things I truly like about kids (*read teenagers) is the fact that they say what's on their minds. Too bad we can't keep that honesty and learn some tact as we get older as opposed to saying nothing.
posted by:
PirateGirl (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (11:01 am)
AYYE Matey! , Beware of the black spot!
Whew! At least it wasn't a giant buger!
..although, I'm SURE the kiddos would have definitely clued you in on that one! - "EWWWWE!!!! PD, WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR FACE!?!?!?"
Hope your all healed up and feeling better soon PD! ;)
posted by:
emerging (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (11:22 am)
My comment was too long, so I wrote a post. I hope your disfiguring malady doesn't force you into social isolaion.
posted by:
bawdy (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (12:30 pm)
I'm sure everyone's seen worse things than your face.
posted by:
auntconi (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (1:16 pm)
Reply to: PastorDave
the toilet paper trail ~ now I had to LOL as I pictured you 'watching' to see how long.........
hehehe...
posted by:
intricategirl (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (1:46 pm)
In that case, holy cow man! What happened to yer face?! Wrong side of a soldering iron??
posted by:
surrogate (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (4:40 pm)
Is the hole where your nose used to be?
posted by:
mimi (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (5:41 pm)
they call me the "fashion police" at work...i tell everyone when anything isn't what i think is right! and...i always ask "what happened?" because i love to give and to receive attention and/or sympathy...so, Pdave, what happened to your handsome face, dear? do you feel better now? i sure hope so. xoxoxox
posted by:
mimi (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (5:42 pm)
Reply to: surrogate
ewww! in my youth, i actually trained to be a nursing assistant and one of my patients actually got cancer on his face and the hole was where his nose used to be! it was shocking (and smelled really badly...cept'n he couldn't smell it!) aggghhh...i can't believe i just wrote that! xoxo
posted by:
mimi (
reply)
post date:
05.29.08 (5:43 pm)
Reply to: surrogate
ewww! in my youth, i actually trained to be a nursing assistant and one of my patients actually got cancer on his face and the hole was where his nose used to be! it was shocking (and smelled really badly...cept'n he couldn't smell it!) aggghhh...i can't believe i just wrote that! xoxo
posted by:
ggirl (
reply)
post date:
05.30.08 (11:07 am)
I would be envious of your cosmetic surgery (because I have lots of things I think could be improved), but I know it can be very painful. I hope it wasn't for you.
I probably wouldn't comment on the burnt place because I'd consider it impolite, but I would certainly ask if you're okay. That way you could tell me or not.
posted by:
surrogate (
reply)
post date:
05.31.08 (5:54 pm)
Reply to: PastorDave
I've always wondered how people end up with toilet paper on their feet. Do they miss the bowl?
posted by:
LadyG (
reply)
post date:
06.01.08 (7:40 am)
The thing about kids is that they will definitely tell you the truth, that is why it's said don't ask a kid how do I look if you don't want to hear the truth, because you might not be looking as good as you think.
Hope you are feeling better PD.
posted by:
toztee (
reply)
post date:
06.02.08 (12:32 pm)
I saw you in person on Fri....I did not see anything on your face that did not belong there for the last, oh say 50 years. I thought how unfair for you to look so good after all these years. Heck if I'd known there was something there to harass you about, I most definitely would have. Dang!!! I missed a golden opportunity. Though you didn't seem to miss notice of what I was trying to keep hidden from folks about my immediate attire upon your arrival. Truly I thought you looked great! You are still a young looking fellow. You took great care of your skin over the years and it has paid off well to your benefit. That blonde hair of yours doesn't show gray either. Where did those good genes come from???? Love to the family! Much gratitude to you for what you did. Take care and keep out of the sun. Keep that pretty face of yours young and wrinkle free.
posted by:
sebastianjoshua (
reply)
post date:
06.02.08 (5:58 pm)
no hurt i guess... lol
2 weeks ago i received 5 shoots for my tooth filling... argh i almost cry lol
