Our County Prison is a big and sprawling complex housing thousands of inmates. It is edged with the prerequisite barbed wire and dotted with tiny widows poked through thick walls. The gatekeepers, guards, and workers portray the initial impressions of surly punks who take their jobs far too seriously. But I think it is the natural result of having to interact with the unusual clientele on a daily basis. Probably they come into the job wanting to be nice guys and even make a difference, and as they become more in touch with the true darkness of the human condition, they become less caring and more antiseptic in their approach. That, and the fact it truly is a dangerous business.

Of course the metal detector beeps as I walk through. I know the culprit- metal inserts in my shoes. Thankfully, this time, I do not have to endure a strip and cavity search. The grumpy guard just mumbles “humph…shoes ” and waves me on through.

I get in line with the rest of the visitors. Most are minorities. It is blatantly obvious that most that are in this jail are black and Hispanic. Why? I certainly do not think it is anything inherently inferior about race. Clearly there are cultural and socio-economic factors at play.

It is at least a quarter-mile walk to the Pod where I will meet the first inmate. I climb three flights of stairs, traverse a wide corridor the length of two football fields, turn left and walk a gently rolling hallway at least the same length. Along the way I meet a lady making the return trip. She is laboriously dragging a leg, obviously the result of a stroke. Thus I note this place is not handicap accessible, and there are no wheelchairs. There is a mindset about jails and incarceration, at least in this part of the country. The prisoners are there for punishment, not rehabilitation. The intent is to get the most bang for the tax dollars, with comfort and appearance and amenities set aside.

Finally, I arrive at a series of little phone-booth sized rooms, one of which bears my assigned number. This is where I will make my visit. We will converse through a pane of thick glass, hearing one another through holes somewhere under the table. I sit down, visitor nowhere in sight, and will wait for 30 minutes before he arrives. It is a nasty little room. I imagine how difficult it must be to visit with someone with whom you have an emotional attachment. Somehow my hand grazes the bottom of the desk, touching something sticky and spongy. And I make note to thoroughly scrub that hand as soon as possible.

Lots of nicknames and obscenities are chiseled into the desktop by bored visitors. And Bible verses. I wonder what possesses a person to deface public property with such a strange Christian witness, and I ask the same question when I see the Christian quotes written upon bathroom walls. I’ve got to admit that religious people are a strange lot. And my current setting confirms this insight, because religion is alive and well in prison. It is characteristic of those I visit in jail that they are eager to talk about faith, God, and the Bible. Usually they attest to personal conversion and determination to live for the Lord while suffering such trial, which in their opinion has been unfairly inflicted. I'm pretty sure much of this comes from guilt and a true desire, convenient for the moment.

(Next - The Visit. He's been pumping iron!)

 

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posted by: bawdy (reply)
post date: 07.15.08 (12:19 pm)

It sure sounds like a sobering experience.

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posted by: barnabus1 (reply)
post date: 07.15.08 (2:27 pm)

I should think that if they are christians, step 1 would be owning up to what you've done...accept personal responsibility...blame yourself! ie admit you're a sinner! Maybe that's something they have to grow into....Question...you say, "she" but at the bottom...He's been pumping iron...2 interviews?

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posted by: PastorDave (reply)
post date: 07.15.08 (2:43 pm)

Reply to: barnabus1
Well, yes, I have two people in prison to visit. And, since this is based upon a true experience, I'm trying to protect the identity of the person. I'm actually blessed that my church membership has not discovered this blog, or seem to have no interest. In my almost 4 years of writing posts, most will find themselves reflected somewhere along the way.

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posted by: PastorDave (reply)
post date: 07.15.08 (2:44 pm)

Reply to: bawdy
Well, there does not seem to be much room for levity and humor is the place. I would give it a try, but would rather not be put on someone's hit list.

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posted by: spook102956 (reply)
post date: 07.15.08 (7:04 pm)

Yes, it is VERY difficult to see a loved one through the pane of thick glass. It is also difficult to stand in line watching everyone else watch everyone else who is waiting to see their loved one. I experienced this several years ago. A very sobering experience to be sad for the reason I was there but having my mind wonder and feeling sorry for others who were also waiting. My heart especially went out to the elderly waiting for, I imagined, to see a son or daughter.
I always went my dad to see my brother and my heart especially went out to my father. But we made it through and my brother, thank God, made it out. And don't be quick to judge. Maybe most are guilty, but I think we sometimes convict innocent people. I'm not talking of my brother. Yes, he WAS way behind on child support (his reason for going to prison) but he also has emotional/mental problems and cannot work like you and I. I know that sounds like an excuse to many for a man who was a minister for 13 yrs and has a Master's degree. But they have not lived with him and do not know his struggle. I do.

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posted by: PastorDave (reply)
post date: 07.16.08 (1:17 pm)

Reply to: spook102956
I know there is a hard sound to what I have been writing, but please stay with me as I continue this series. There is a lot of unsound thinking, and yes I will even categorize it as mental illness, with those behind prison walls. Their minds most often do not process reality and morality as do ours. Now, I am angry with these two persons I recently visited. Both have several repeat visits in lock-up. Both are destined to continue to do stupid things and go back to prison, I have little doubt. They are intelligent and yet they are stupid. But, I'll share such impressions as we go along.

Sorry about your brother. I'm fascinated that he has been a minister and has a Master's degree. He sounds too much like myself. Any way he would like to interact with some blogging?

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posted by: spook102956 (reply)
post date: 07.19.08 (4:52 pm)

Maybe I'll ask him. I think you'd enjoy what he has to say. He is highly intelligent--was always the Honor society student, etc. But since he's been out of the ministry has little to do with church or preachers. You cannot believe the sermons he used to preach--very well prepared and meaningful. But he wouldn't want to talk religion to you now. Any you being a minister, he might not be receptive at all. I'll wait and see if I feel there is a right time to bring it up. Thanks for asking.

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