It's Not A Bad Color
(Note: This post is also shared at Vox. Check it out- it may be a good place to cross-post)
In less than two days I will be off to Hawaii for ten days! I have never been to an island, except for Goat Island in the middle of the Tennessee River. I have never been further west than California, and that to visit family. So this is an exiting time. I sit in my office having a hard time concentrating on my sermon for tomorrow. Earlier today while getting a haircut the barber made mention of the ever increasing bald spot atop my head. Generally I try to ignore such insults. But it got me to thinking that maybe my head, and then the rest of me, may get sunburned. Further I thought about my white, pasty complexion, healthy from a dermatological point of view but too touristy on the beaches of Hawaii. So I purchased a bottle of sunless tanning lotion and tried it out. Now I’m orange. I wonder how that will appear in Waikiki?
My wife and I have been on a diet. Once a day we replace a meal with a protein drink substitute generously called a smoothie. It is actually pretty good, natural and filled with vitamins and supplements, and most importantly it knocks out the hunger for several hours. We are going to try to continue this regimen while on vacation. To save space, Debbie put the powder into little individual plastic bags. So we have about ten quarter-pound plastic bags of white powder in our suitcase. When I saw the product of her hard work and ingenuity, I asked aloud what would be the possibility of this causing trouble with airport security? I can only imagine the background checks and body cavity searches that would ensue. Perhaps this would be our ticket to Guantanamo instead of Oahu? So we put the powder back into the original container.
There’s fun and sun ahead. I think. My intention is to write a daily post. I am not a daily-post kind of guy. As you know, I will generally put out about two per week. But I will try to make it interesting, and hope you will tune in. Pictures will be included.
I will be the orange guy with the bald spot.
04.18.09 (4:17 pm) [
edit]
posted by:
inkspector (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (1:40 pm)
Can't beat a sun, fun, and surf vacation in Hawaii. I hope you both have a wonderful time!
posted by:
meganpunk4evermusic (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (1:42 pm)
Hope you have a great time!!!!
posted by:
barnabus1 (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (3:33 pm)
Sounds fun!!! have a SUPER time...can I hide in a suitcase? hehe Keep in touch!! Looking forward to your blogs!!!
posted by:
emerging (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (4:13 pm)
So which is better in terms of looking like a tourist - pasty white or orange? I guess at this point, you could go all out and get the requisite "Hawaiian" shirt. If you're very lucky, maybe you'll find one that complements your new sun-kissed glow? ;) Have a great time!
posted by:
scubadiva (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (4:25 pm)
As long as the orange coordinates with your leopard print speedo....
Go easy with the sun and apply sunscreen at least 30 mins before you head out to the sun.
And let me know how the body cavity searches go. If you tell them you have allergies to latex, you might escape "the glove".
posted by:
Ladyg (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (5:01 pm)
Hope you hace a great time PD.
posted by:
auntconi (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (6:58 pm)
Aloha `oe = Farewell...
Have a splendid time. The sun is so bright that no one will recognize that you are 'orangeish' ~ I don't think ... :)
posted by:
babe4jesus55 (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (10:26 pm)
The jealousy is rising.... oh well, I'll be off on my own summer adventures soon. Take care!
posted by:
surrogate (
reply)
post date:
04.18.09 (11:37 pm)
Just offer to snort some of the powder for the security folks to prove it doesn't get you high.
Can I come along? I won't even tease you about the bald spot.
Dave's going BALLLLlllllD.
Damn.
Couldn't help myself.
-Can we expect tBlog Postcards?
posted by:
tampi (
reply)
post date:
04.19.09 (7:33 am)
have a great holiday
posted by:
bawdy (
reply)
post date:
04.19.09 (1:09 pm)
If you post any pictures of yourself wearing a grass skirt and doing a hula dance, I am out of here! Enjoy your trip.
posted by:
PooPotPie (
reply)
post date:
04.19.09 (4:31 pm)
PD, have fun make sure you use sun screen over that color you have now. It's not pretty without it, trust me I know of someone who did that. She didn't use sunscreen, when she came back she looked like she was glowing in the movie theater. Don't forget the SPF...
posted by:
fractalmom (
reply)
post date:
04.19.09 (6:50 pm)
i'm so sorry. i am sitting here giggling about the whole white powder in little bags thingy. i can only imagine how that would have gone.
when you get to the checkpoint, and they ask do you have any guns....do NOT say...I hope to smile!!
(my father in law did that. crossing over into canada. they said...Pull the car over right there sir........
posted by:
rosietulips (
reply)
post date:
04.20.09 (10:12 am)
Oh my gosh! What exciting news!! Have a great time and bring sunscreen! Actually, I am sure you won't have a problem finding sunscreen in Hawaii. BWAHAHA
